Day 15: And the Boys...And the Boys...

 

Haha…Just kidding. Kind of…Although, I tried to figure out my “type” while talking with some friends last year, and we worked out that I like tall skinny British men. So I guess it’s fairly accurate :~) Especially since ten and eleven were two of the people we were referring to...

As you have probably guessed, today's post is about the kind of guy that attracts me.

I guess I like guys who are well balanced in their masculinity. I definitely couldn’t deal with a guy who makes me feel like the man in the relationship. He has to be manlier than me. Which, the way guys are going, is getting hard to find. Not that I am all that masculine, but I am not scared of bugs or the dark or many things in general. I have had guys try to get me to smash bugs for them, end up nearly in tears because I was holding a snake (completely harmless Garter snake, not something that would do any sort of damage) near them and they were afraid that it would jump on them or something, and be nervous to go outside in the dark just because it was dark out. Not for any good reason, such as there were panthers outside, or a madman with a chainsaw (that we knew of). Of course, I’m also no interested in the kind of guy who is all “Sports, cars, hunting, blah blah blah…” It’s totally possible to be manly without being all macho. The ability to do basic household and car maintenance, build a fire, things like that, those are good skills for anyone, male or female, to have, and I think it’s something that most boys don’t learn growing up anymore, and they are things that men should know how to do.

I like educated men. Not necessarily those who have gone to college (though I am not anti-college. It would be pretty hypocritical if I only liked guys who went to college since I’ve not been), but a guy who can read well and carry on an intelligent conversation and who knows what he is talking about because he forms his own opinions rather than simply going with what other people say.

Musical is a big positive. That cliché is very true. And tall…I mean, musical and tall, those things are sort of shallow. But they’d be nice. I thought for a while, when I liked a guy I knew in Brazil, that I’d be ok with someone shorter than me, but I have changed my mind. And who knows. Maybe one day I will eat those words. But taller is definitely a huge plus. I'm not terribly bothered about eye or hair colour. I'm usually not big on blue eyes, but it's not a deal-breaker either way. I've met people that I find very attractive only to decide that I think they're physically ugly when I find out what jerks they are. And I have met people that I do not find attractive until I learn what wonderful people they are. It isn't a conscious decision, just something that happens.

I’ve found that I am not interested in guys who talk big. You know, the kind who say, “When I reach this point in my life, I’ll be able to do this thing that I’ve always want to do.” and then never actually do anything to reach that point. I realize that reaching your life goals isn’t something that will come immediately, but you have to be trying for them.

And lastly, a guy who wants to go on adventures. And not even anything big. An adventure can be hiking through the woods on a snowy, moonlit night. An adventure can even be going and volunteering somewhere or doing a mini road trip. But sitting around watching tv isn’t good enough by far.

I used to go to a church that did the whole “make a list of what you’re looking for in a husband” thing. I now think that is kind of nonsense. A lot of people would miss out on the right guy if they did that and stuck to their lists. But there are things that are important to each person that aren’t negotiable. And they’ll be different for everyone. For example, I had a friend tell me once that he’d found that women tend to go for more feminine men. And this was something he’d seen many times. So perhaps I am a bit of an odd one in saying that I would be far more interested in someone less feminine. But these are some of the specific things which are a big deal for me. I’m sure I could think of more, but this is probably enough. 

I was going to end the post with a few photos of the guys I find physically attractive, but decided that would probably be a little bit shallow :~) So I'll just end it by saying that I am pretty sure I have very unrealistic expectations for men (personality wise...), and for now, this picture rings pretty true:

 

Day 14: Weird Things You Do When You’re Alone

I actually do pretty much the same things when I’m home alone as I do when I am home with people. I guess I’m more likely to watch a movie in the middle of the day, or stay up all night and then take a nap on the couch with one of the dogs in the middle of the afternoon. I don’t really do anything extra strange. Though, one time, I roasted marshmallows in our wood stove and made myself s’mores while I was home alone. I don’t think that is all that strange though. It seems like common sense to me.  
I make goofy wookie noises, but ask my Mom, I do that when others are home too. Although I will say that I do make weird noises a lot more when I am home alone, but that is merely because there is no one around to tell me I am annoying and I should shut up.
I tend to cook more, just because I don’t have to worry about being in anyone else’s way in the kitchen, but that’s not weird.
Hmmm….I’ve been thinking and thinking, and I really can’t come up with anything weird that I do when I am alone. I guess maybe I think out loud more when I’m the only one in the house, but otherwise, I’m just as weird when there are others home. Which either shows a refreshing amount of honesty or the sad fact that I am really just a very strange person and not bothered about who knows.

Day 13: 11th Image

 For today, I was supposed to think of a word and do a google image search on that word, then write something inspired by the 11th image. Here is the image I found:

The word that I chose was Resilient. I just opened a book to a random page and that happened to be one of the first words I saw (I didn’t want to use joining words). It was interesting to see my thought process as I looked at this picture. First off, it looks like a very hopeful picture. One that says that no matter how bad things get, life will find a way. Then it reaches the skeptical portion of my brain (a little surprised it didn’t reach that part first), and I think, “ok, first off, is this a real picture?” Did someone put a sunflower in the middle of this desert area for the sole purpose of getting an “inspirational” picture? Wouldn’t be too surprising. Could be 2 different pictures even. Someone photoshopped a couple of photos together. Might not have even been for any sort of inspiration. Could have been nothing more than a project for a photoshop class. Who knows. And then it goes even more into the negative side of “what if it is a real picture? How long can a flower like that last in the desert anyway? That beauty is out there where it’s mostly unseen Even if it does produce seeds, most of them will shrivel and die in the heat and, unless there is rain at just the right time, there’s a good chance that none of them will grow. The flower will be gone, and nothing will be left of it other than this one picture. Though, who knows what this photo will mean to people who take it as a symbol for resilience, and a reminder to never give up because there is beauty no matter how dry things look.
And then I look at it again, and it reminds me of the Veggie Tales movie The Lord of the Beans (a spoof on The Lord of the Rings...). I think that perhaps this flower is on a quest to get to the mountains behind it. Who knows what draws it there and what perils it will face before completing its quest. The photographer though should stop stalling it. Who knows...perhaps the fate of the world rests upon this little sunflower's petals.
Anyway...Y'all probably should have skipped that last paragraph ;~)

Day 12: What 3 Lessons Do I Want My Kids to Learn From Me?

1. Be compassionate, both toward humans and animals. It is very easy to focus on compassion for one, and not the other. If you’re helping people, others think you’re doing wrong when you stop to rescue a starving puppy. If you’re helping animals, you tend to think that there are enough groups out there helping people, so that gives you an excuse to not bother. But it is important for one to be balanced enough to have compassion for both

2. Read a lot.

Cosette and I read fairy tales before bed for a while. I don't think she was really all that into it though...

Don’t let anyone tell you that Kindles suck and you’re a sellout if you carry a Kindle on a trip instead of packing 87 books. You will carry a lot less weight and be able to read many more books if you simply take a Kindle. You can take Les Mis, Anna Karenina, Oliver Twist, The Iliad, and hundreds of other books with you. You won’t have to settle for the selection of books you were in the mood for the day you packed your bags, because you’ll have books on every subject you want on your little tiny Kindle. You can even put them on your phone (but be careful about using your phone for reading too much…I understand that finishing “one more chapter” is 4important, but making an emergency call, or using Google maps may end up being even more important in a handful of circumstances). On the flip side of that, don’t let people tell you that weight is all that matters when you are packing. If you have a certain book that you want to take with you, take it. I love this quote from Inkheart, by Cornelia Funke “If you take a book with you on a journey," Mo had said when he put the first one in her box, "an odd thing happens: The book begins collecting your memories. And forever after you have only to open that book to be back where you first read it. It will all come into your mind with the very first words: the sights you saw in that place, what it smelled like, the ice cream you ate while you were reading it... yes, books are like flypaper—memories cling to the printed page better than anything else.” If you have a book that is special enough to take with you on a trip, take it. And be sure that if something happens to it, you get it back. I had a copy of Les Mis that I accidentally left in a hostel in Adelaide. It is just a paperback copy, nothing wildly special, but it has been around the world with me. I tracked it down and paid for it to be returned to me. I don’t regret the money I spent to get it back, but I would have regretted it for a long time had I not managed to get it back. Also, don’t be a book snob when you start reading. I’m talking about those people who only read this type of book or that. Have standards…I mean, if a book is absolute rubbish, don’t waste your time on it just to say you’ve finished it. But give all sorts of different genres a chance. Listen to audiobooks, read classics and books by people who have never written before. Know who your favourite authors are, and why. If you have books you hate, especially if they are books that the general populace likes, know why you don’t like it.

Les Mis after coming from Australia

 

3. Be self-sufficient. This is valid for both boys and girls. At least be able to do basic car and home maintenance. So many people can’t unclog a drain, throw a breaker, change a flat tire, etc. Learn what you can so that you don’t have to call someone to help you with every little thing. Girls often don’t think this is necessary, because they’ll just marry someone who can handle all of these little details. But anymore, most guys don’t have any idea what to do. One of the best ways to learn basic skills is observation. Watch your parents while they’re cooking or doing general maintenance. Give a hand when you can, and ask questions.

4. Just for a little extra, I have a 4^th lesson…Don’t throw away memories. Now, I'm not talking about being a hoarder, but I know so many people who throw away mementos and delete photos. When you have a moment you want to remember, take a picture of it. Don’t worry about if the friendship will last forever and if the memories will eventually make you sad.

Don’t worry about if you look like a nerd with your camera. Just take pictures. And if someone gives you a card or a picture that makes you smile. Just keep it. Slip it between the pages of a book and when you come across it months or even years later, after forgetting that you left it there, it will bring back memories of the time that it was given to you and the reason it was given.

This was from a little girl who was terrified of animals when we first met. She ended up being comfortable with the horses and was a pretty good rider. She drew me this when the holidays were about to start.

 

Day 11: Sing A Little Song

This is one of those where you’re supposed to put your mp3 player on shuffle and see what comes up. It really came up with a random selection of music this time.
I'll admit, it's a bit of a dull blog post, but it's on my list, so I did it :~)

1. The Rake’s Song-The Decemberists-The Hazards of Love

2. A Family Affair-Hans Zimmer-Pirates of the Caribbean Soundtrack

3. Chennai Express Background Score-Chennai Express movie soundtrack

4. Jack the Giant Slayer-Jack the Giant Slayer Soundtrack

5. Be Prepared-Lion King soundtrack

6. Collide-Jars of Clay-If I Left the Zoo

7. The Hazards of Love 2 (Wager All)-The Decemberists-The Hazards of Love

8. The Wizard of Oz Main Title-The Wizard of Oz Soundtrack

9. Tea and Sympathy-Jars of Clay-Much Afraid

10. Teenage Dream-Glee Cast

 

Day 10: 5 Blessings in My Life

1. Growing up in a whole family. I didn’t even realize until I was out of high school how common broken families are. Or families where the parents are still together, but constantly fighting. I also didn’t realize until I was older that it is uncommon for parents to show affection to each other around their kids. My parents didn’t show affection in inappropriate ways around us, but they would hold hands and kiss around us. I never got why my friends were so surprised by that. But they always said it was amazing to see parents who acted like that.

2. Travel from a young age. And not traveling to resorts and suchlike. We camped, we slept in the car, we went to work camps where we cut down trees and poured cement as our “bonding activities”. And we seldom traveled on our own. There were a few times my siblings and I would spend a week at camp without the rest of our family, but almost all of our actual traveling was as a family. And even when I went to summer camp, it was a mile away from home, and my Dad would look to see if I was in sight when he drove by on the way home and would honk his horn and wave at me.

3. Living on a hobby farm. None of our animals really had any sort of use whatsoever. Oh, we tried a couple of times to raise chickens and turkeys that we were gonna butcher, but we wound up not being able to eat them. And my Mom sold mini horses for a while, but she sold them more so that we had room to have new babies the next year. She definitely was not making money on that venture. Mostly though, we get animals because we want them, not for any real reason. Though, I suppose wanting them is as good a reason as any. And my Mom has always been pretty ok with super random animals in the house. Like the reptiles we’ve had…She wasn’t happy with the mice I brought home when I worked at a barn though…Especially when they got loose.

4. My first pony didn’t know she was a pony. This may not sound so much like a blessing, but after I had some experience with a pony who acted like a stereotypical pony, I started to see how great it was to have a pony that acted intelligent like a horse rather than belligerent like a pony. I was also fortunate to be able to keep her even when I was technically too tall for her. It helped that I didn’t have showing and such in mind, so I didn’t have to “upgrade”.  And my parents weren’t the type to sell my pony out from under me, even when I was out of the state, or even out of the country. I spent hours upon hours with that pony, and I know that even though I was gone when she died, she died with people who loved her there. I don’t have to wonder what happened to her after I outgrew her.

5. Learning to read as well as I did. I don’t really even remember learning to read. I sort of just learned. And I started out reading proper books rather than the little books kids usually learn to read with. It’s really good to actually be able to read well.

Day 9: Something I Feel Strongly About

I feel very strongly that if parents plan to own pets during the time they have children, they need to start teaching their children to interact appropriately with said animals from the start. It seems like anymore, children have no idea how to treat animals. And a lot of that is because the parents go with the idea of “kids will be kids” and they aren’t bothered by the fact that their pets are terrified of the children.


With Chelsea when I was a baby :~) She wasn't a huge fan of people in general, and I'm pretty sure she'd have put me in my place if I was too mean to her. And she was my Mom's favourite child, so I had to be nice to her :~P

I do understand that sometimes kids don’t quite get that they have to be gentler with small animals than they do with other humans. But when kids are hitting animals, or pulling on their tails, etc., etc., seemingly just to scare them, I’m not ok with that.

I asked my Mom recently if I was like that with animals, after scolding yet another small child who was too rough with my animals (and yes, I make it clear that I don’t approve of such things, even to small children). She told me that my siblings and I were never like that. She made it clear that we were to treat animals kindly, and we did. I never recall having any desire to scare the living daylights out of our pets (I made a point of doing that to my sister instead).

My first dog, Stukey. We could do anything with that dog, and she never snapped or did anything bad to us. Her biggest problem was that she was scared of storms and guns and would run to my Grandparents' house if she was frightened. 

I believe that it is important for a child to have pets, and to grow up with close relationships with animals. However, I also believe that kindness must be taught, or else a kid may as well grow up without animals.

And a love for animals that begins at a young age often ends up being a lifelong love :~)

 

Day 8: Words of Wisdom That Speak to Me

A lot of people struggle with this. Especially as they get older. There’s so much pressure to use your time in a useful manner. But really, why is that so important? And who determines what is useful? Sometimes, the most enjoyable moments in my week are the moments that I am doing nothing useful at all.

One week, while I was in India this last year, I was spending some time at a farm, doing horse therapy and whatnot. I was being very useful, either teaching people to do horse therapy, or typing out instructions for what to do with it when I was gone, and explanations of why horse therapy works. I did a ton of research, and editing that research down so that the dozens of pages I sorted through were in a packet that was actually feasible for people to read.

Anyway, all of that to say that I was busy being useful a lot of the time there. I frequently had a movie or audiobook playing while I was typing, but was just sort of half paying attention to it. One night, however, Marius wasn’t feeling so good, and he really wanted to cuddle. So I stopped the stuff I was working on, put a movie on, and laid in bed, cuddling with Marius. We snuggled like that for the entire movie. I didn’t do anything useful, not even any sewing or knitting. Just cuddled with my little boy and enjoyed the movie. Sometimes I look at the way I have spent my evening or my day or whatever, and I am annoyed with myself. I know that I should have done something else, and I’m irritated about that. But this wasn’t one of those times. I loved the time with Marius, and even now, I am glad that I did that. I was wasting time, but I do not look at it as time wasted.

Snuggling with my sick little boy. He's so fat now compared to this photo :~)

 

Day 7: If Only I Had A...

The question for today was 'What are 5 things someone can do to win your heart?'

 

Hmmm...That’s interesting. Not sure if I have one of those...I’ll give it a try though. I've made the font bigger on this one so it doesn't look like such a pathetically short blog :~) 

1. Write letters. Real letters with a lot of thought in them.

2. Love my animals. Tolerating them or pretending to like them won’t cut it.

3. Go on adventures with me. Don’t just talk about going on adventures and then choose that we should sit and watch tv. Actually go on adventures.

4. Accept my quirks and faults.

5. Be passionate about travel and doing things to benefit others.

Day 6: Something I Struggle With

Again, this post could go on for a while. But I will spare the 2 people reading this and pick one thing.
One of the biggest things that I have been struggling with lately is caring. I have hardly gone out anywhere since being home. I have been to 2 weddings, and one small party with some friends. And that’s about it other than time with families. I have options of things I could do to be around people. And they’re good people, people I usually get on well with. And I keep thinking that yes, I’ll go next week and see people, go to a game night or a Bible study, invite people over, etc. And then when it comes down to it, I don’t go. Because I just can’t get myself interested to the point that it seems worth the amount of effort. I mean, I do a lot of things at home. It's not as though I am simply sitting on the couch watching tv all day, but I just don't care to go out.
I know this is sort of a problem in my life. But I’ve grown so used to not having people to hang out with that I just don’t have the interest anymore. Pretty pathetic excuse, I know, but that’s the way things work.
Anyway…I realize that this isn’t something that should be such a struggle. I mean, how hard is it to get up off of my butt, take a shower, get dressed, and walk out the door? But it seems to be very difficult for me.   

Day 5: 5 Places I Want to Visit

1. Mongolia

Not sure why, but I’ve wanted to go to Mongolia for years. And then reading Horse Boy made me want to go even more.

 

 

 

 

2. Romania

I read a book called Fell which was set in Romania, and since that, I’ve wanted to go. The descriptions were so beautiful, and it sounds like a place I would enjoy visiting.

 

 

 

3. Rajasthan

Lots of people have told me that it is one of their favourite places in India, and it sounds amazing. Also, there is an animal rescue there that I want to volunteer with.

 

 

4. Iceland

It just looks so gorgeous. If you don’t agree, watch The Secret Life of Walter Mitty…

 

 

 

 

5. Antarctica.

Because how cool would that be? :~)

 

Obviously, since these are places I want to go, and have not been, these are not my photos. I did a google image search and found them all. One day...

 

Day 4: Drives Me Batty!

My top three pet peeves. Wow...to only pick three. Tough challenge. I’m just not extremely tolerant. Anyway...

Oh, and my translation of the term ‘pet peeves’ is that they are things that annoy me but aren’t actually major issues. So things like abortion/genocide/abuse won’t be in here. But I am not just being petty.

1. People who use text speak and misspelled words. Especially in professional or semi-formal interactions. I have had bosses who use so many abbreviations and such when telling me my schedule or asking me to pick up an extra shift that I can hardly tell what they’re trying to say. Even communicating with people in general has grown so sloppy that sometimes I’m not sure what people are saying. I know I sound like an old lady, but the way my brain works, it doesn’t properly process such things. And then you get to the fact that people are losing the ability to spell in general, partly due to a lack of reading, and it is just a mess.

2. People who start ‘discussions’ with the intent to argue. Some people use controversial issues like abortion or gun rights. Others use seemingly innocent topics such as ‘what kind of ice cream is the best?’ And you wind up going in circles about who is right. Usually these are people who are firmly set in their feelings (no matter how completely nonsensical), and who know that they won’t change your beliefs, but simply want to argue anyway. I’ve even had people tell me that they know there will not be any result from the argument, they just like to argue. I am all for a good discussion. Even when I don’t agree in the least with the person to whom I am speaking. But only when there is mutual respect and interest to learn from the other. If you go into a debate with an open mind, it is beneficial, even if you both come out of it with the same beliefs. However, if you go into it with the intent to argue, you may as well not even bother because your mind is completely closed to anything.

3. People who take pleasure out of ruining books and movies by telling you the ending, or at least a huge plot point. I couldn’t care less if they themselves like to know the end of the story first. If I tell someone I don’t want to know details and they tell me, I don’t figure we’ll be very good friends. If someone can’t respect a small request like that, why would I think that they would respect anything else in our relationship?

Day 3: Words Make a Difference

The subject for today is “Something someone told you about yourself that you never forgot”. Hmmm...That opens a pretty messy can of worms. I could go with a good thing someone has told me, or I could go with a bad thing.
The thing of it is, for most people, the bad sticks in your head a lot more than the good. It spins in there as you mull it over, wondering if you really are such a bad person. You can do more damage with your criticism than you can do good with your positive words. So I’ll give an example of that.

I had someone tell me a while ago that I needed to go to personal development training, because everyone I interacted with thought that I hated them. I was too antisocial, because I didn’t go into a room with a cheery hello for everyone. I didn’t agree with what was said, but it got into my head, and I was left with the feeling that no one liked me because I wasn’t chipper enough, and I needed to change my whole personality. Because really, what it all came down to was that I was introverted and simply not as talkative as one or two people I worked with thought I should be.
The funny thing is, because I was upset about it, I went to a couple of people who knew me very well, and cared enough to be honest if I was doing something wrong. They told me that it was crazy. They said people didn’t think I hated them, and it was just the opinion of those couple of people, not that of the general public. These friends said that everyone they’d spoken to about me thought I was likable and made people feel welcome. I was a friend to the adults and a big sister to the kids. According to them, I had a very positive impact on the people I interacted with.
But which of these stuck with me? Which of these pops into my head at random moments? And usually those moments when I don’t need to hear more negative about myself...The original comments. The comments that say I need to change who I am. Words said by someone who didn’t know me and didn’t care about me (though she would have claimed different to both of those).
I still struggle with that. What is wrong with me? Do people really not like me? Am I really such a terrible person? I don’t know that I will ever completely forget it.
I guess at the end of this is the caution that your words do make a difference. You never know what little comment that you made without thinking will stick in someone’s head. If it isn’t constructive, don’t say it. Even if you think it could be constructive, look at how it will be received. Are you close enough to the person to really know if what you are saying is true? Are you speaking in anger? Is it really worth getting a jibe in if you’re going to make someone question if they are a good person or not?
There are a lot of positive things I have also had said to me that I remember. But the things that really leave an impact are often the negatives.

Day 2. Ten things that make me really happy

1. My “kids”. Cosette, Marius, and Leaf. Especially snuggling with them and seeing the way that Leaf and Marius still cuddle and play together even though Leaf has a new dog sister to hang out with.

2. Doing horse therapy with kids and seeing the difference it makes in their lives.

3. Snowstorms

 

4. Getting caught in warm rain showers.

5. A good middle of the night chat with friends.

6. Hiking. Especially with good company

7. The ocean

8. Photography. Especially when I have the whole day to spend taking pictures by myself

 

9. Writing a story that I get caught up in.

10. Giving gifts to the people I like. Or baking for them. Which is kinda like giving a gift to them.

Day 1: Introduction

I’ve been looking at various blog challenges and such to decide what I want to do. Should I do a 52 week blog which is one a week, or should I do a month long challenge with a blog a day? So many choices.
The one I decided on is a blog a day for the time that my folks are in FL. I’ll have a lot of time to myself, and writing will be a good way to fill that time. I’ll do my best to actually do a blog a day. And yes, I am going to be lazy and use this introductory blog as one of the days.
I combined a couple of challenges to get the correct number of blogs, hopefully I don’t have any that will be repetitive. At the moment though, it looks like my biggest challenge will be keeping my darling Marius off of the keyboard while I type. He likes how warm my laptop is. I’ll just have to take time to write while he is asleep. Although I usually take that time to get some knitting done. Basically he is a psycho when he’s awake and it’s too cold for him to spend the day outside.
Even if it is a bit of a challenge though, I need to spend more time writing. I haven’t done nearly enough of it lately, and that’s not a good habit to get into. I don’t plan to continue this daily writing when my parents are back, but hopefully I will at least be in a bit of a habit of writing, and will be more firm about making time to write.
I may post some other blogs during this time, which have nothing to do with the challenge. We'll see how ambitious I get :~)
Interaction would be great. Leave a comment. Let me know what you think. Let me know how I can improve my blog. Tell me something I should write about.