It has been a year since my Uncle died. I still expect to walk into the house and see him there at the table. I still catch myself starting to ask Cody (my Aunt and Uncle's dog) if he's gonna go for a ride with his Dad while his Mom and I are out. It's weird how your brain won't let go of things like that. Especially the good things. You expect everything to stay the same. And especially, because I was in India and missed the funeral, it was extra strange to get home and go to Neita and Darrell's (I hope I spelled that right, since Neita just told me yesterday how to spell it), and Darrell wasn't there.
I wonder at times like this, what I would have done differently the last time I saw the person if I knew it was the last time. I don't know for sure even what the last time was that I saw Darrell. Probably some family thing around Christmas. I am sure we chatted some and laughed and interacted pleasantly. As we did whenever we saw each other. I don't know that I would have done anything different. I feel like making a big to-do would have made us both super awkward. I would have just acted the same as normal, and enjoyed the time we had together.
It has been close to 3 years now since I saw my brother. I think the last time, we went out for supper. I don't have fond memories of that last time. I don't think we fought, but it wasn't real enjoyable. I may have given him a hug before he left, I don't remember. But even from that time, I don't have regrets. The way things turned out were his choice, and I did what I could to try to keep the relationship going.
I have much better memories from the last time I saw Darrell, and to be honest, I miss him more. I smile when I remember him whereas I mostly don't bother remembering Steve.
Do all that you can to make it so that, if this ends up being your last time seeing someone, you can be happy about the last time you saw them. That doesn't mean that things will end up being perfect. Sometimes the other person will end up ending the relationship no matter what you do. But if you have no regrets, you know that you've done all that you can do.
A lot of people agonize about their last words to people they love. I think it's a lot more meaningful though if you treat them like you love them every time you're together. Don't wait to do something meaningful when someone is on their deathbed. There may not be a deathbed, and you may not have realized it was your last time.
If you love someone, let them know. In some cases, it may be weird to actually say, "I love you." Maybe you should still say it. It's up to you and your situation. If you think you should, do it. But really, actions speak louder than words. I've had people tell me that they love me, and I know it's a load of crap. And I've had people that I don't think have ever said that they love me, but I know that they do. Say it, show it, whatever. Just make it clear that you love them.
I wonder at times like this, what I would have done differently the last time I saw the person if I knew it was the last time. I don't know for sure even what the last time was that I saw Darrell. Probably some family thing around Christmas. I am sure we chatted some and laughed and interacted pleasantly. As we did whenever we saw each other. I don't know that I would have done anything different. I feel like making a big to-do would have made us both super awkward. I would have just acted the same as normal, and enjoyed the time we had together.
It has been close to 3 years now since I saw my brother. I think the last time, we went out for supper. I don't have fond memories of that last time. I don't think we fought, but it wasn't real enjoyable. I may have given him a hug before he left, I don't remember. But even from that time, I don't have regrets. The way things turned out were his choice, and I did what I could to try to keep the relationship going.
I have much better memories from the last time I saw Darrell, and to be honest, I miss him more. I smile when I remember him whereas I mostly don't bother remembering Steve.
Do all that you can to make it so that, if this ends up being your last time seeing someone, you can be happy about the last time you saw them. That doesn't mean that things will end up being perfect. Sometimes the other person will end up ending the relationship no matter what you do. But if you have no regrets, you know that you've done all that you can do.
A lot of people agonize about their last words to people they love. I think it's a lot more meaningful though if you treat them like you love them every time you're together. Don't wait to do something meaningful when someone is on their deathbed. There may not be a deathbed, and you may not have realized it was your last time.
If you love someone, let them know. In some cases, it may be weird to actually say, "I love you." Maybe you should still say it. It's up to you and your situation. If you think you should, do it. But really, actions speak louder than words. I've had people tell me that they love me, and I know it's a load of crap. And I've had people that I don't think have ever said that they love me, but I know that they do. Say it, show it, whatever. Just make it clear that you love them.
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| A picture that Neita just shared on her fb page of her and Darrell :~) |
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